Disappointment

In other words, I try not to set my expectations very high.

Locust Bean Gun

Well, that was a bit literal.

Professor Layton and the Curious Illiteracy

I recently finally played through Professor Layton and the Curious Village. Such a relaxing, fun paced, mentally stimulating game. One thing that puzzled me though is that whenever a note was found Layton would ask Luke to read it aloud to him. That didn't make a lot of sense unless he can't read cursive, or his comprehension abilities are limited. That's really funny to ponder considering he's a master of puzzles.

He says Luke is his apprentice, but I'm betting he's actually around for when Layton can't figure something out, or in this case read notes for him.

Crash Course - License Acquired

This is the conclusion to my adventure through the hazerdous land of driver's education. To be honest about the entire situation it really wasn't that horrible. It was easy. Easy is good, usually. My perception of education was dropped a few more levels once I finally left that building. In the end though I knew I would never forget how amusing of an experience the entire ordeal would leave with me. That's the sole reason behind why I made this comic -- The memories were still so fresh in my mind.

Anyhow, I hope you enjoyed viewing my portrayal of the hell I had to endure.

There was an incident after this where the DMV wouldn't give me my license because they said the paperwork was wrong. After taking it back to the school though the owner said the state had changed the forms and that whoever was looking over my paperwork at the DMV was either stupid or didn't realize it had been changed. I had to go to three DMVs before I was able to obtain my license because of that.

Crash Course - Test Time

After all of the time I spent in that class, including listening to a man who couldn't read properly and managed to go off topic faster than a five year old with a sugar high and ADD, it was quite easy to remember everything from the books to take quizzes and by the end, the test. Some people on the other hand...

I seriously couldn't gather my head around how he wasn't able to remember or answer some of these questions. It was multiple choice and most of the questions were basic logic with the answers blaring out of the page like a firework in a dark cave. I believe he passed in the end anyway since you only needed 70% if I'm not mistaken.

Crash Course - Saint

Nearing the end of my education at the driving school one of the previous class's students was brought back to the our lovely prison because the DMV said he hadn't acquired enough classroom hours to qualify for his license.

If what he stated was true about the classes being even worse I can't even fathom the sheer stupidity that filled that room before I had to endure its mental abuse. Luckily for him he only had to be there for two classes more and they were better than our previous ones where Mr. Kent discussed random subjects.

Crash Course - Things to Avoid

After living in your general surroundings you usually begin to see patterns in how things function. The same thing applies to when you're driving. People have certain ways of driving, certain personality shifts when they're driving, and their cars themselves can indicate how their driving will be. I've been a passenger and driver long enough to evaluate how somebody will drive just by looking at their car. The same applies to understanding what type of people will be in the area I'm in.

Crash Course - U-Turning

When I think back to when I acquired a driver's permit and was required to drive a certain amount of hours I somehow assume other people my age learned to drive on better vehicles. My mom's car at the time was a 1998(I think?)Plymouth Voyager. That car was a step up from the 80's Ford station wagon we travelled so many years in, facing backwards most of the time for myself. That's not saying much though when you consider it drove like a slug on a salt bed in the middle of summer. But, BUT, it had power steering. Where am I going with this? Well, dad mostly taught me how to drive, and most of the cars he drove didn't have power steering in them at all. Or if they did have power steering is was very limited.

So because of dad's cars posessing a congenital, abnormal alignment, or at least something of that nature, I had this assumption that most cars handled in the same manner. No, they don't handle that way. I've since learned to drive a regular vehicle.

Crash Course - Circles

When I lived in New York there were certain areas that had traffic circles for merging into different routes. Maybe it has changed since then, but from what I remembered as a kid they were nervewracking because they were commonly situated on the border of New Jersey, the state with exceptionally aggressive drivers.

The rules for yielding within these traffic circles was different for each state. For New York drivers, if I remember correctly, you yielded before pulling into the traffic circle. It was more cautious. And for New Jersey drivers they would rush right in and expect those in the traffic circle to yield for them. Strangely enough that's how people here tend to yield for anything, traffic circles or not.

Crash Course - Turn Signal

Turn signals normally mean someone wants to merge over into a lane or turn somewhere, right? So if you're behind the driver while in the opposite lane you keep a steady speed and let them merge in, correct? That's how it should be, but where I live it isn't for many drivers.

For some reason when you put your turn signal on while in traffic around this area people will FLOOR IT to keep their vehicle at the same speed next to your car or pass you like it's an emergency. There can be at least four car lengths of room to merge over and this happens. Why do they do this? It's like they think they're in a nascar race and your turn signal means there's an opening for them to get ahead. You're not racing! Stop that!

Crash Course - Patience

When I go out driving I try to use common sense and utilize the basic rules of driving etiquette. You know, because that's why they invented driving rules in the first place even if we don't always follow them. There have been cases though where I can only try to understand why people become completely irrational in their way of thought when they step behind the wheel, to the point where their impatience makes them seem completely ignorant.

I could maybe understand her frustration considering the opening to the shopping center was only the size of one car, which really makes no sense since it appeared to be built during the 70's when cars were the size of today's trucks, but there was no need for her constant honking and screaming. What did she think our turn signal meant we intended to do? Turn right? Her vehicle was so large we couldn't have turned right if we desired to do so.

Crash Course - Driving Day

So this was it, actually getting to drive a car instead of sitting in a class room from hell. I didn't know what type of car we were going to be driving in so my curiosity was peaked as I waited to be picked up.

If I remember correctly it was a mid to late 90's Ford Focus that felt overly cramped. The seating felt more like a hard, reclining chair. The color was your typical, ugly dark blue/navy that American car manufacturers seem to love. And it was also automatic, sluggish, and it smelled like burnt coconut air freshener. This is going to be fun.

Crash Course - Why Us?

After finishing reading and quizzing through half of the driver's handbook we were told we would be starting the driving portion of this class. That would sound like a good thing, right?

Well it turned out that Trav and myself were going to be spending our mornings and evenings with Mr. Kent from now on. I vividly remember both of us having the same expression, as if we were picking straws and both us somehow ended up with short ones. In Mr. Kent's defense though he was way better at teaching driving than he was at teaching through a textbook so our mornings, as crazy they were, which you will see later on, were not as mind numbing as the classroom.

Crash Course - Corrections

So far we've learned that the teacher in this class couldn't read in a normal manner and that Trav is a genius by suggesting all of us take turns reading various parts of the textbook. That's great because we could then focus on what we were reading. But some of the students had issues with reading as well. One of them was Budd. He told me he went to a special school along with Don because they supposedly had learning issues. After spending a few minutes helping Budd to read more easily I concluded that whoever was teaching him didn't care or was on the same level of teaching ability as the instructor of this driving class. Budd wasn't stupid and he learned very quickly. During one of the classes though...

Mr. Kent corrected Budd while he was trying his best to read the textbook. The man who couldn't read correctly was correcting someone who was actually pronouning the actual word he was reading instead of saying something completely unrelated. I could tell it hurt Budd's confidence because of the manner Kent used when he corrected him. Needless to say, I was infuriated by his action and let him know it through my expression. He turned quite pale and tried to shrug it off as if he never said anything. Luckily for the rest of us he never corrected anybody again.

Crash Course - Reading

If you remember from a previous comic, the teacher in this class couldn't seem to comprehend what he was looking at when he would read the textbook. It was as if you were listening to babelfish translate another language into English and proceed to try dictating it to you. Luckily for all of us a solution was found for this unbearable problem.

Trav, how smart you were. Hearing his raspy smoker's voice while he read the textbook was like hearing angels sing in comparison to the indecipherable sentences constantly flowing out of the teacher's mouth. After Trav's ingenious proclamation we all took turns reading a paragraph or chapter, which actually forced everyone to stay focused for once.

Crash Course - Dogs and Cats

 Most of the people in this class I was forced to participate in got along fairly well. The only two who didn't share the same mutual accord were Trav and Dash. They were able to socialize and be normal people outside of class, since Trav was like that with just about anybody, but during class Dash was generally more of an idiot than when not in the classroom.

What actually happened during this incident was more along the lines of Dash arguing with the teacher and then saying something along the lines of "At least I don't act like that gender confused dude over there", which of course caused Trav to retaliate. They started yelling at each other, calling each other names, and pointing out each other's inequities. It was an interesting sight to behold.

Crash Course - Rambling

This comic is going to sound awkward because I draw my life stories using animals. It's easier to build characters based upon animals considering a lot of people have similar traits, such as people who look like their pets. The bad part is this comic refers to animals in it because this was an actual conversatin during one of the classes. Just look past the fact that there are dogs in this and it'll make perfect sense. (Or you can still think of them as dogs and your perception of this class will be possibly funnier.)

More than half of the classes resulted in these discursive conversations. Why couldn't we focus on the textbooks and get done with the classes faster? The attention span in this class was similar to a five year old with a remote and 500 channels of garbage to filter through

Crash Course - Teim Two Reed

This was fun to witness as soon as the class started.

He couldn't seem to read the words he was looking at. I don't know if that's how he would read books when he wasn't reading out loud, yet during this class we were all in shock at how he couldn't dictate the lessons in proper manner. Supposedly he had some type of hypertension issue, so maybe, just maybe, that caused him focusing issues. Whatever the cause, trying to comprehend what you were reading in the obviously poorly written textbooks was made twice as difficult when the teacher would read more than half of the lessons incorrectly.

Crash Course - Any Questions?

During these classes, whenever Mr. Kent asked us if there were any questions somebody would usually ask about a subject not relating to what we were learning. In many cases it was actually pretty funny, but it made the classes longer because we weren't focusing on the textbooks we had to read.

I'm still not sure why Trav cared to know his horoscope. Maybe he was trying to find some type of compatibility within the classroom.

Crash Course - Introductions and the Teacher

After settling into our classroom surroundings we all introduced ourselves. Meeting new people and finding common interests is usually an amusing ordeal, since we're all different, for the most part. In the case of this class though, I barely shared any similar interests with any of my classmates.

From this comic you can probably gather how some of these people acted, but I'll explain their traits in a bit further detail anyway.

Don - He was this kid who would come in with Budd since they both went to the same school. He didn't talk a whole lot, but he was likable.

Budd - This guy is actually one of the people I got along with best in the entire class. He might seem like an annoying person, as he'll frequently be shown to act in these comics, but his demeanor was actually very proper and he was easy to get along with.

Dash - He liked to smoke. Did you know he liked to smoke? Did you know he liked to smoke more than just tobacco? Yeah, maaaaan, he was like, always smoking.

Sarah - She was the girl across from me in this class, and also the ONLY girl in this class. There's not a whole lot to say about her other than she was actually very bright and could get along with everybody in the class, including Dash with his always buzzed personality.

Trav - This guy had a really scratchy, smoker's voice, wore name brand clothes all the time, had a man bag that carried more than Sarah's purse, and he always had an air of confidence about him. He was also one of the smarter people in the class. We got along rather well, which is actually a good thing as you'll see why later on.

Mr. Kent - I'm not going to explain how the teacher was in this class since you'll find out enough about him as this comic progresses.

Crash Course - Intro

Throughout my life I've had to deal with a fair amount of stupid things. Haven't we all. For myself, one of those stupid things was learning to drive. To be honest, learning how to drive was not the stupid part. No, of course not. Learning how drive where I live and taking the course to earn my license on the other hand was a nightmare - a funny nightmare, but a nightmare none the less.

The memories of being required to endure these trials of my patience were still so fresh, even after all these years, that I put it upon myself to write a short comic series describing the amusing, yet idiotic, atmosphere I had to spend many days asking myself when it would end. So without further explanation, here is the start of Crash Course.

The best way I can describe how I felt entering this school and meeting this fascinating variety of individuals is that it was as if I had been dropped into The Breakfast Club. The only difference is that it wasn't morning, it wasn't a pleasant looking library, and it wasn't a movie that could be stopped.

Yo-Yo Trick - HANGMAN

WORST-TRICK-EVER.

TRON Danmaku

Do you remember the movie TRON? Of course you do. Do you remember how the programs were forced to play games? Of course you do. Have you ever wondered what type of games they would have to play now? No? Well, if I were in control they'd be subjected to something like this.

Ecco Dur Dorphin

I remember back when I first played Ecco the Dolphin. It was at a friend's house. His mom rented it to play it, but we decided to try it as well. Never has a game been so frustrating to play because of the awkward controls and gameplay surroundings being so confusing. It was a gorgeous game though and the music was strangely hypnotic, which was probably done that way intentionally to captivate you, immersing your mind into Ecco's world.

Anyway, the game's difficulty was beyond infuriating at times, and after looking back at how weird the game was I made a comic showing how stupid I felt Ecco always acted. For those of you who never played this game the first comic won't make a lot of sense. I didn't plan on making this into a full comic series at first so I didn't explain that at the beginning of the story Ecco is dared by one of his pod mates to jump as high as he can out of the water. Once Ecco has done this a waterspout sucks up all his friends and any of the surrounding life that happen to be in the area. After that, Ecco goes off in search of how to get them back. The story involved paradoxes from going back in time, aliens that harvest sea creatures, and swimming inside giant spaceships -- Enjoy.

Aquaman

Poor Aquaman can't stand being a man of the sea sometimes.